Comments for Theresa Froehlich

Comment on Mastering Life Transitions: Leveraging the Power of Inspiring Quotes by Theresa Froehlich

Theresa Froehlich — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 23:00:58 +0000

Limiting beliefs do just what they’re supposed to do. They limit us. Eleanor Roosevelt has some great quotes. Thank you for joining in the conversation.

Comment on Mastering Life Transitions: Leveraging the Power of Inspiring Quotes by Jill

Jill — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 21:38:57 +0000

Quotes by Eleanor Roosevelt are inspirational. “You must do the thing you think you cannot do” is one of my favorites.

Comment on Parenting Adult Children: How To Resolve Emotional Dilemmas by Theresa Froehlich

Theresa Froehlich — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 18:25:35 +0000

Thank you for visiting here. Glad to know that these articles are helpful to you. You’re already associated by visiting here. Please feel free to leave comments and join in the conversation with others.

Comment on Navigate Life Transitions: Dealing With Empty Nest Loneliness by Theresa Froehlich

Theresa Froehlich — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 18:01:11 +0000

Hi Lonely Mom,

You’re dealing with many topics that empty nest moms deal with. Know that you’re not alone.

Once mothers finish raising children, they’re also beginning a new adulthood of sorts. Some call this the second adulthood -a time to figure out questions such as “Who am I?” “What should I do with my life?”

Human beings find out identity through relationships. This is why becoming an empty nest parent is especially hard for stay-at-home-moms. One mom recently told me, “I feel scared, and I feel I need someone to hold my hand.”

If you would like to explore some life coaching to help you find your way through all these transitions, please click on the button “Ask Me A Question” to submit an inquiry.

Coach Theresa

Comment on Parenting Adult Children: How To Resolve Emotional Dilemmas by Gautam Chaudhury

Gautam Chaudhury — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 11:31:14 +0000

I mam interested to be associated

Comment on Navigate Life Transitions: Dealing With Empty Nest Loneliness by Lonely Mom Part 2

Lonely Mom Part 2 — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 19:45:05 +0000

Here is a short addendum to my story . . . I guess what hurts me most right now is the way both the girls went from being close to me (little girls) to shutting me out (teenage rebellion) to blowing out of the house with their middle fingers in the air, then barely speaking to me again (young adults). My 18yo sleeps at her girlfriend’s house nearly every night, even on school nights (yes, girlfriend but hey, I’m a cool mom, right?) I know both my daughters are caring, loving young women because I see they way they shower kindness & affection on others – their friends, teachers, adults, other mothers and even strangers. It makes me feel so slighted & insignificant in their lives – like I don’t even matter and they don’t even remember one fun thing about their awesome childhoods. All they do is pick apart my shortcomings and tell me everything I do wrong. I can’t help but take this personally, after all the heart & soul I put into raising them and building the relationship I thought I had with them. What happened to me? I was always so strong and thick-skinned. That’s the kind of mom who raised them. Where did I go? I DO understand unconditional love, and that we raise our children to let them go. It is not THEIR responsibility to reciprocate or ensure our happiness as WE age. What I don’t get is the high level of disrespect that I receive on a daily basis, simply for breathing. Makes me count the days till graduation and the 18yo just goes already. They are both nasty to me 95% of the time (the 25yo not as much any more). Side note: My girls as (half) sisters are not exceptionally close, but I think this may come around when the 18yo matures more and begins to “get it” after she leaves home and that frontal lobe finally kicks in. My husband and I never argued in front of the girls or spewed adult problems on them. I was never a screamer or hitter, was always very fair and open-minded, and didn’t shower a ton of material crap on them, including cars. Maybe at times I was a bit too cool and permissive with their freedom to come and go, but I was a teenager in the 70s and I think we are just of a different mindset, and the girls were responsible & trustworthy. I just don’t understand what I did to deserve such disrespect now, and can only surmise that this is just another phase of their development. I think the reason teenagers are so nasty is so we won’t miss them when they move out! I don’t miss the baby days, but what I am going through now is certainly not what I expected.

Comment on Navigate Life Transitions: Dealing With Empty Nest Loneliness by Lonely Mom

Lonely Mom — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 18:52:06 +0000

I was a SAHM for 18 years, while working part time. Was very hands-on & involved in all aspects of their education and extra curricular activities – scout leader, class mom, etc. I still have the same part time job, but now as an almost-empty-nester whose 18yo daughter has withdrawn from me, I’m feeling bored & lonely. My 2nd husband and I have been together 24 years, married 18, but are not close – he has been gone nearly every weekend with his friends leaving me to basically raise the girls alone. This was fine back then, as I enjoyed time spent with the kids – playing, teaching, guiding, taking them fun places & just being their mom. I just don’t know what the next phase of life is for me. My parents, to whom I was close, and one older brother, are all deceased – no other siblings. I’m really not very close to anyone at all and thought the closeness I shared with the girls would last into their adulthood. I blame myself for our lack of closeness through their teenage years, as I became somewhat withdrawn and unable to fully handle their growing independence as they shut me out of their lives. All normal stuff, I know, but it still hurts and I find myself stuck in a perpetual pity-party of total worthlessness. The girls have seven years between them and when they were 7 & 14, I was caregiver for my elderly mother, who developed dementia. After Mom died, I became kinda depressed and have been stuck in a downer mode ever since (that was in 2005). I’m my happy self most of the time, but both girls have pointed out that I seem unhappy a lot. My eldest daughter, now 25, married a good guy in 2011 and moved away to pursue higher education (all very good stuff and I’m very proud). I do miss her. She moved out immediately after turning 18 and honestly, I rarely saw her after that. Younger daughter, now 18 and a senior in HS, is planning on leaving immediately at the stroke of graduation. Are they rushing to get away from a smothering mother, or did I simply raise intelligent, independent girls? Why should I doubt myself as a mother now? Being their mom does not end when they grow up. I told myself as they were growing up NOT to wrap my entire life around them because one day they would go, but the fact is I maintained few interests outside the girls. I am totally NOT a smothering or intrusive mom, and always encouraged their independence and freedom to choose. Eldest daughter now accuses me of having been too lenient and blames me for HER poor choices in HS. Well, I gave her enough rope to hang herself but was always there for her when she needed me. There was never a real man in the house to put his foot down cause my husband had no father figure and is not strong-minded when it comes to raising kids. I tried hard not to emasculate him but alas, he has no backbone and so I had to take over the reins in the household. Neither one of the girls ever gave me any real concerning teen troubles – just a poor attitude, sloppiness, and fairly typical rebellion. The eldest ran with a bad crowd in 9th & 10th grade but pulled out of it after some of their group disbanded and because I stayed on her butt. They are both bright students and good, respectful people to the outside world. I know I did a good job raising them and my eldest daughter’s father has even told me so (he left when she was one – I saw him at the wedding). I guess I just miss the days when they needed me more and feel sad that me and my husband and I are not more connected honestly, I don’t love him enough any more to even work on it. **sigh** Maybe it’s time to get a pup . . .

Comment on Christian Spirituality: Dare To Be Honest With God by Theresa Froehlich

Theresa Froehlich — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 18:55:28 +0000

Somehow many of us think God wants to hear from us only when we’re good, cheerful, and problem-free. Relying on God’s grace is an ongoing learning process.

Comment on Christian Spirituality: Dare To Be Honest With God by rosemarie

rosemarie — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 23:39:38 +0000

Good one, Theresa. We fear being whine-y, yet God encourages us to cast all our cares on him. The difference between what pleases him and what offends him may be whether or not we trust God for a solution. Whether we rely on his lovingkindness that will see us through our challenges.

Comment on Parenting Adult Children: How To Reduce Tension by Theresa Froehlich

Theresa Froehlich — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 00:23:23 +0000

Letting go of our adult children is a hard thing to do, yet it’s the necessary thing to do. As parents, we may not feel that our adult children have got it together (“I still find it difficult to trust all of his choices and capabilities”), but our children learn by being out there wrestling with real life and facing the real consequences of their real choices. Letting go strikes fears in the mother’s heart!

Did our parents feel the same emotions and struggles that we face now? I would imagine that they did. As a teenager and young adult, I made choices that would have scared my mother if she had know about those choices. But I learned not to go there again, not because my mom told me not to, but because I personally suffered the consequences.